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Eighty Years On
A poem to be included in an imaginary sequel to AA Milne’s ‘Now We Are Six’ entitled, ‘Now We Are Eighty Six’ I never was a good man –...
Ouch!
Toe-curlingly bad analogies The winding country lane snaked endlessly ahead like a continuous series of lavatory S bends joined together...
Bookish
A short story which incorporates six book titles Having pulled himself together after being outwitted by the miller’s daughter,...
Question Time
A problem submitted to a well-known literary figure cast in the role of agony uncle and his response. Dear Uncle Eddie. Our daughter...
After The Dance
A sequel to Edward Lear’s ‘The Owl and the Pussy-Cat The Owl and the Pussy-Cat sailed away From the land where the Bong-tree grows, And...
Thoroughly Modern Willie
Extract from the diary of a Shakespearian character who has woken up to find him or herself transported to the present day June the...
New Year Letters
An acrostic poem in which the first letter of each line spells out the words, Happy New Year Hi, mother dear. Yes, Uni’s great, no news –...
Going For A Song
A teetotallers’ Drinking Song to herald the New Year When I was a toddler, good as gold, Upon my mother’s knee, She said, ‘Little lad, if...
Bah! Humbug!
A poem in dispraise of Christmas They came upon the midnight – clear As bottled beer I swear, A band of angels drawing near And hovering...
Cheesy Feat
A poem written to disprove G.K. Chesterton’s assertion that the poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese From time...
Pseud's corner
An example of pretentious tosh in the shape of a review of a TV or radio soap opera or any other piece of entertainment aimed at the mass...
In Two Minds
A dialogue between two parts of oneself at odds with each other Although you’re out of sight I know you’re there. Let’s form a coalition,...
In a Jam
A poem composed in the midst of a travel hold-up As dark descends on Ridgeway Hill, On Ridgeway Hill, Besunken in this cheerless chill,...
The Day of Doom
A short story entitled ‘The Day of Doom’. Wrongly condemned, Cecelia sank to her knees and bowed her head to the block. At the foot of...
Body Parts
A poem in praise of a bodily part that has been overlooked by poets Shall I compare thee to the Pearly Gates? No pearls thy heavenly...
Novel approach
A poem using the title of a well-known novel Oh Carol, what a day it was – a truly dreadful day With Darryl and Kate, your parents, mine,...
Bed Hopping
A bedroom scene written by a novelist who would not normally venture into such territory ‘The going will be slow – and fiendishly hard,’...
Trochaic
A poem written in the metre of Longfellow’s ‘The Song of Hiawatha’ describing Hiawatha’s experiences at his computer Proud to own a...
Tongue Twister
A tongue-twisting limerick When slick Mick mocks Max, Max mocks Mick, To mock makes the two of them tick. Though it’s trivial and trite...
The Long View
A news bulletin on the outcome of the 2010 general election delivered by a well-known figure from history Behold there were three: Hope,...
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