A sharp rejoinder on the part of a character questioned in a well-known line of poetry
A question such as yours, sir, needs putting in its place.
The answer is as plain, sir, as the nose upon your face.
It irritates non-humankind when humans waste their time
By questioning the obvious to suit some silly rhyme.
Your question, when considered, seems so pitiful and crass
That I’m tempted to rebuff it with a curt, dismissive ‘Pass!’
No one asks a tortoise if it carries round a shell,
And no one asks a skunk, sir, if the creature has a smell.
Birds they all have beaks, sir, and cows they all make milk
And chickens all lay eggs, sir, and silkworms all spin silk.
Leopards have their spots, sir, plain for all to see,
And elephants have trunks, sir, I’m sure you will agree.
And sheep? We have our fleeces, sir, as soft as carpet mats –
That’s why we look like jumpers under knitted bobble hats.
So yes. I have some wool, sir, no doubt to your surprise.
And may I ask of you, sir, do you have any eyes?
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